Honesty is the best policy- Benjamin Franklin.
It has always been and always will be. Some may question
this quote, what about “white lies”? Lies that we say to prevent causing hurt
or harm to others and to ourselves.
How can honesty be the best policy when you see someone/even
yourself so happy and then dampen their moods or your own moods by telling and
facing the truth?
Think further…
Would someone else or you be truly happy in any situation
that seems like a bed of roses when in fact all experienced is fake and totally
a lie?
No secrets can be kept forever; the cat will be eventually
let out of the bag.
Lies cannot be sustained or maintained, they only can be
maintained through more and more lies. Why would we want ourselves or others
around us to live a life full of lies? Deception, lying to others and ourselves
will bring unbearable pain and regret.
Thankfully, everyone is given a choice. A choice to “help”
another or yourself remain in those “white lies” or the choice to allow another
or yourself to get out of the room full of lies and face the truth, the
brutally honest truth.
Be smart, remember that all things will come to light, do
not let or wait for the one little lie ruin what you have or can have.
3 Steps for Honesty
Have Courage
To yourself- Face those fears and insecurities, seek self-acceptance and let go of that ego, improve and grow from there. Celebrate your talents and work on your shortcomings.
To others- Take that leap of faith to have that confidence in those around you. That even if the truth hurts; they will cherish your honesty and take your feedback into account. This is also an opportunity to test whether your relationships are healthy and secure.
Have Self-Awareness
To yourself- Take
others feedback & opinions into consideration, take time to recognize the
lies that you have been telling yourself.
Become observers of
yourself- When you have a strong emotional reaction to something, Pause, when
what you say does not match how you act, Pause, when you think of irrational
thoughts, Pause. Ask yourself what does this say about me.
To others- Question
yourself- Are you hiding the fact really for the good of them, or the selfish
intentions of desire to maintain the good relationship. Besides, if there lies
in the relationship, the trust that was initially built upon would fade,
ultimately destroying the relationship. Do unto others what they would like to
do to you.
Let go of that
insult, blame, exaggeration, or judgment
We tell lies because
the truth hurts. However we can lessen the hurts of the truth by taking it in a
positive manner, as a way to grow and learn.
To yourself- Focus on
how the truth can help you and instead of being trapped in the circle of
self-judgement and pain.
To others – Tell the
truth in a serious but light hearted manner, show your openness and treat the
truth as a way to allow another to grow. Do not put it in a manner that it
makes them feel embarrassed, shame, or ridiculed.
Honesty is ultimately good for yourself and all those around you. Display and seek the truth, for it never lets you down.
"Having the simplest honesty, create Legends"
